God designed our world to function correctly through relationships. It has (with a few exceptions) always been His way to work through man to meet man’s needs. Though He decides who the man (woman ) should be. When God saw Adam’s need for companionship in the Garden, He created another human being (Eve) to meet it. God even had to become man in order to validly and adequately meet man’s need of salvation. Human beings function on earth in the general context of interpersonal relationships. However, relationships or associations between or among people can have positive or negative effects and outcomes. This fact becomes clearer when you carefully consider the following Biblical texts : “He who walks with wise men will be wise, But the companion of fools will be destroyed.” (Prov 13:20) ; “Do not be deceived: “Evil company corrupts good habits.”” (1Cor 15:33). It has rightly been said that your friend is either a Jonathan or a Jonadab.
    Jonathan was the first son of Saul the first king of Israel, and heir apparent to the throne. However, Saul fell out with God and lost legitimacy. By a Divine twist of events, David the last son of Jesse, became a member of the royal staff. At first, his services to the royal family consisted of playing music in King Saul’s presence to help him find relief from the evil spirit that tormented him. Things went well between David and the king for a while. Then Israel encountered the Philistine giant by the name of Goliath, who defied Israel to produce an opponent who would go hand-to-hand with him. On noticing how all Israel fled from him, David wondered how an uncircumcised Philistine could have the effrontry to defy the armies of the living God, and therefore offered to fight Goliath. The victorious outcome of the fight in Israel’s favour and the consequent praises showered on David by the women of Israel, galled king Saul, who viewed their ascription of slain thousands to him and ten thousands to David as a threat to his kingdom.
    From then on, the King’s insidious move to eliminate or have him eliminated began. On two occasions he attempted pinning David to the wall with a spear. On each occasion David successfully evaded the weapon. That further frightened the king, as it dawned on him that God must be involved in David’s life. Jonathan, King Saul’s son, was David’s friend. He was greatly distressed when he discovered that his father, the king, wanted to kill David, who had been loyal to him. Needless to say, Jonathan protected David from his father.  Saul became aware of Jonathan’s protective concern and actions towards David and reprimanded him: “Then Saul’s anger was aroused against Jonathan, and he said to him, “You son of a perverse, rebellious woman! Do I not know that you have chosen the son of Jesse to your own shame and to the shame of your mother’s nakedness? For as long as the son of Jesse lives on the earth, you shall not be established, nor your kingdom. Now therefore, send and bring him to me, for he shall surely die.” And Jonathan answered Saul his father, and said to him, “Why should he be killed? What has he done?”  Then Saul cast a spear at him to kill him, by which Jonathan knew that it was determined by his father to kill David.” ( 1Sam 20:30-33).
    As the plot against David’s life thickened, so did his friendship with Jonathan become closer. The duo had earlier on entered into a covenant with each other. Consequently, Jonathan, within his ability, ensured that David fled to relative safety from his father. In addition, the Bible says, ” Then Jonathan, Saul’s son, arose and went to David in the woods and strengthened his hand in God. And he said to him, “Do not fear, for the hand of Saul my father shall not find you. You shall be king over Israel, and I shall be next to you. Even my father Saul knows that.””(1Sam 23:16-17). Wow! Imagine the expression “and strengthened his hand in God”. That is exactly what a godly friendship or relationship should do in your life.
    Jonadab, on the other hand, was the friend of Amnon, David’s eldest son. The Bible refers to him as a very crafty man (2 Sam 13:3). Amnon developed a  lust for his step sister, Tamar, and desired to sleep with her. Though Amnon was greatly distressed over his seeming love for Tamar, he did not know how to go about achieving his aim until Jonadab, in his craftiness, gave him counsel, which the Bible records as such: “So Jonadab said to him, “Lie down on your bed and pretend to be ill. And when your father comes to see you, say to him, ‘Please let my sister Tamar come and give me food, and prepare the food in my sight, that I may see it and eat it from her hand.’ ”” (2 Sam 13:5). Simply put, Jonadab advised Amnon to rape Tamar. Amnon’s response to that counsel is recorded in the following words of the Bible: “Then Amnon lay down and pretended to be ill; and when the king came to see him, Amnon said to the king, “Please let Tamar my sister come and make a couple of cakes for me in my sight, that I may eat from her hand.”…. Now when she had brought them to him to eat, he took hold of her and said to her, “Come, lie with me, my sister.” But she answered him, “No, my brother, do not force me, for no such thing should be done in Israel. Do not do this disgraceful thing!  And I, where could I take my shame? And as for you, you would be like one of the fools in Israel. Now therefore, please speak to the king; for he will not withhold me from you.” However, he would not heed her voice; and being stronger than she, he forced her and lay with her.” (2 Sam 13:6,11-14)
    Amnon failed to heed the voice of reason from his step sister, who had reminded him of the dire consequences of his proposed action. Jonadab’s advice and influence had beclouded his senses of reason, morality and decency. It is important to note that when he was done, the result was: “Then Amnon hated her exceedingly, so that the hatred with which he hated her was greater than the love with which he had loved her. And Amnon said to her, “Arise, be gone!”. It is clear from the quote above that, evil, no matter how alluring and promising of ecstasy it is, only proves to be a mirage in the end.  Amnon’s actions, based on Jonadab’s counsel, cost him his life. The irony of it all is that it was the same Jonadab who reported Amnon’s death to king David : “Then Jonadab the son of Shimeah, David’s brother, answered and said, “Let not my lord suppose they have killed all the young men, the king’s sons, for only Amnon is dead. For by the command of Absalom this has been determined from the day that he forced his sister Tamar. Now therefore, let not my lord the king take the thing to his heart, to think that all the king’s sons are dead. For only Amnon is dead.” (2 Sam 13:32-33). “Only Amnon is dead?” What a callous remark to make concerning a man his evil counsel had led down the path of destruction. No wonder the Bible says, “Therefore “Come out from among them And be separate, says the Lord. Do not touch what is unclean, And I will receive you.”” (2Cor 6:17). Choose your association and relationships wisely. Shalom.